Friends
For These Things I Am Thankful
I am going on strike. I have been asked by six people what I am planning to cook for Thanksgiving, and each have been shocked when I have responded, “very little.” I have the bird, I have some vegetables and I have stuff to make desserts, but am I cooking for two days to eat left overs for four, heck no! I plan to celebrate Thanksgiving, but not in the traditional way.
I am thankful to be able to have the means in which to purchase the needed items to make such a splendid meal. However, with the cost of food and fuel, I see no reason to spend $200 to make dinner. If I am going to have a $200 dinner, the Chef best come to my table and make sure I enjoyed every savory morsel!
I cook five or six days a week and Tuesdays are my baking day. I bake fresh each week and my friends are all well aware. I am usually asked to share what I make and often do. Today is Tuesday so I have decided to make a pie. I am thankful that I have 
friends who enjoy my cooking 52 times per year. I do not need them to wait until the final Thursday in November.
Because I cook so often, I have found clever if not unusual means to recycle my leftovers. The roast from Sunday is often cut down to make tacos on Mondays or soups or stews throughout the week. The left over cornbread I made on Sunday is perfect for some cornbread dressing. I am thankful that there is enough leftover and I do not have to make a fresh pan special for Thanksgiving.
I have potatoes, both white and sweet, along with peas and other items bought from local growers. I am going to cook for the week anyway, but this week, I am planning to cook a turkey. Since the bird is mid-sized, it is also perfect for making turkey pot pie, turkey noodle soup and turkey salad. I am thankful that I know how to stretch my food budget.
So often we spend this day of Thanksgiving engorging ourselves with overly rich foods, overspending and annoying the 
hell out of each other. Again, I am protesting. My modest dinner this Thursday will consist of a bird and two side dishes. I am not heading out on Black Friday to shop for items I don’t need either. I am staying home.
I have been blessed this year with clarity to understand my place on this universe. I have learned in the past year that less is more. I have learned that to be an educator, I must first educate myself. I have learned that in order to be loved, I must, without reservation give it to those who deserve it, as well as those finding their way. I have, most of all, learned that I am still learning.
I do not require a certain day in which to cook a meal to share with my family and friends. I have learned to manage my money so that I do not have to shop like a maniac the day after Thanksgiving. I have learned to be crafty and can make my friends items they will appreciate, so I do not need to spend money. And for these things, I am thankful.
Old People Are Bullies
Yesterday, I was blessed by my friends to check out the dinner theater on Fort Gordon. If you have not had the opportunity to see a show, please take the time to get out and support local artists and small theater production. However, I think attending this event on a Saturday night was a mistake. I am uncertain if it was senior’s night or someone just unloaded the wagon from Shady Acres retirement home, but one thing I do know, old people are scary.
Please don’t misunderstand; I have nothing against the elderly. I do not advocate elderly abuse, death panels or any reason whatsoever to mistreat another human being, but again, old people are scary and bullies. One octogenarian is not bad, 75 of them, Good Lord, I can still smell the moth balls and Ben Gay! For some reason, the ceremonial dousing of Old Spice or Estee Lauder Youth Dew, does not help the situation.
We entered the lobby on a semi cool evening and there was a big gap in the middle of the floor. We filled the gap, unbeknownst to us that the gap was caused by two lines; two lines of cranky seniors. When the last of our party joined us, some lady, began to chastise us about breaking the line. It was dinner theater, all of the food at the buffet is mediocre, and I politely told her so, and even added, “there’s plenty to go around.” She frowned, made rude comments to her equally cranky spouse, and honestly, it just left a bad taste in my mouth that replaced the twinge of Estee Lauder I was munching on. I think as I turned, they shot me the bird.
One the other side, behind me, were Red Hats and what appeared to be survivors of the Holocaust. For some reason they just kept blocking our way. We had reservations and a corporate table, and finally, one of them got smart and said, “Oh, you are with the group?” Only with this acknowledgement were we allowed to move through the line. Inside was even worse. It did not matter which line we were in, they would just push and shove their way in line, at the bar, at the buffet and even in the bathroom.
I understand you have earned certain privileges and I am going to honor and give you the respect due your age, but old people are bullies. Just because I have not lost all the pigmentation in my hair does not mean that I am stupid. I understand you may have grown up in a time where some who looked like me was not allowed to sit and eat with someone that looked like you, but that was 45 years ago. The same can be said in reverse, you cannot hate an entire race of people based on some incidents in history. Here’s a hint, it wasn’t the entire race, but a few people.
I also know that I cannot be afraid of an entire group of people based on one horrid smell, Ben Gay. And just to be perfectly clear, being old does not give you the right to be a bully. I am honored by your wisdom, but it does not necessarily mean that you are right. You instilled home training in your children and respect, can you display some of your own? Let us also be honest, if you are that far along in age, shouldn’t you be more concerned with being nicer to people to ensure your conversation with St. Peter is filled with the positive?
Related articles
- What Makes a Bully? (education.com)
- Ever Wonder What Makes Bullies Bully? (ronskemp.wordpress.com)
My Favorite Things!
If Oprah can have a list of her favorite things, then why can’t I? As I was walking through the grocers, I came across the 
magazine rack and saw the Lady Oprah dancing across the cover of “O.” She looked so pretty I almost bought the magazine that is until I saw the $4.50 price tag. I was bad, I picked it up and flipped through the pages. Personally, her favorite things weren’t really all that awesome. I can see no real use for these Chocolate Bears for $12 plus shipping and handling. For exactly the same twelve dollars, I can buy some of my favorite things, like frozen vegetables at the ten for $10 sale, which mean I have vegetables to eat for at least 10 days.
I continued to look through some of Ms. O’s favorite things. I did see some items that made me stop and wonder what where she came up with these items.
http://zappos.com retail $120
Originally $137, now $109 with code OPRAH DeuxLux.com
$125 | Saks.com
These are really nice items, but really, we are in a recession and I can’t afford these things. What I have learned over the years is how to take the things that I 
truly love, and make a version of them.
First on my list is Moose Munch made famous by Harry and David, retailing at $29.95. This is Crunch and Munch on steroids. I sometimes will buy it as a treat, but most of the time, I make it myself. Here is a simple recipe.
Second on my list of favorite things are any items that I can make. The holiday season I love placards for my holiday table settings. Oriental Trading Company is always on my holiday shopping list, because I can pick up these easy placards for about $5.00. The kit creates 12 settings, and at this price, I can afford to buy several, even to give them as gifts.
And last but not least, some of my favorite things are bags. Purses, satchels, book bags, shopping bags and anything that I can carry my stuff in. I love to shop on http://Ebags.com. There is everything there for your pockets and your pocketbook. Best of all, the prices are right for your purse.
The whole point to my thought process here is to not over spend or get caught up in the haze of Black Friday and the holiday shopping madness. There is enough retail therapy to go around without breaking the bank and acting like a mad person on a spending frenzy. Out of curiosity, what is on your list of favorite things?
Irony and Stupid T-Shirts
Yesterday, I had the pleasure of taking the annual bus shopping trip to one of those outlet malls. It is always a blast, but I mainly go to hang out with friends, have a decadent lunch, and not have to drive. After so many hours, you take your cache to the bus, seal it in your labeled garbage bag and go back to empty your bank account. However, this time, the bus was not where it was supposed to be. I found the bus but it was blocked in by some self-promoted rapper named Nap-Boy. Our bus driver is upset, our people are upset and I’m thinking, what is the big deal? I sent a tweet to the address on the side of the van, and then I called the number. Here is the beauty of it all, I went back inside the shopping center, took a seat with my Dipping Dots treat, and watched the people pass by. There were a ridiculous number of people wearing T-shirts with stupid sayings on them. Ironically, the rapper that was boxing in our bus, also had a stupid shirt, and he walked right up to me. He, of course, wanted to sell me one of his CD’s. I made a contribution on the condition that he moves his van.
I know I took the long way around on this one, but here’s the point. Out of thousands of people in the shopping outlet in Charlotte, I was able to find one person. Why, because he was wearing a stupid shirt; luckily his shirt matched his van.
He wasn’t the only adult wearing one of those silly shirts. As I sat there, I saw a beer bellied fella pass by in this gem.
I was really tempted to ask what his daughter looked like, to see if it was actually a concern. His daughter showed up. Sadly, Daddy, you can put the gun away. She will be home with you on prom night. I know it’s mean, but I started to chuckle.
Our next wonderful shirt was worn by a Goth kid with green hair. He was also wearing piercings in is eyebrows, his nose, his lip, his jaw, and those big tribal ear circles in his lobes. I laughed when I saw the shirt. The irony, people probably beat the crap out of him his whole life; especially looking as he did. He probably became a Goth when his parents stopped paying for his self-defense classes.
This t-shirt was worn by a young black man who was sporting this shirt in green. He also had on green shoes, a plaid green outer shirt and some green underpants. I saw the underpants because his pants were well below his butt. The young lady at his side walked along with pride that this gem wearing fashion risk was her man. Question, was she one of the wayward ho’s?
The more I sat there, the more people I saw wearing tees with sometimes inappropriate if not downright offensive imprints.
as 
After about a half hour, I had to get up and move, because people were starting to wonder why I was laughing. I could not snap photos, but I did find most of the shirts on a website. I became more tickled as my friend joined me and she saw one that made her laugh even harder. It was a T shirt of the Ass Family and each of the family members also had on the same shirt. Who was the Smart Ass who came up with the idea to wear these out in public?
The irony of it all was wasted on the wearers. Individuals who wear these shirts are probably doing so to get noticed or get some attention. The attention you are getting is not for the funny sayings on your shirt, it is because the reader is processing the whole thought. The thought adorning your boobies, beer belly and bird chest is only the beginning.
One lady stopped and asked why we were laughing. I told her honestly, if you only knew what I was just thinking…..
Did you just unfriend me?
Today I was just given a shock. I was checking my Facebook page and hubby made the comment that our son had something funny on his wall. I went to check and found that my own child had unfriended me! The nerve!
Here is the beauty of this; he is not able to see my post because he is not my friend. Therefore I can talk about him and he not know.
What does it really mean in Americanspeak when someone unfriends you on a social network? It means that you have been deemed unimportant in their daily lives. It means they do not care to know what you are doing on a daily basis and you are not privy to their information. In other words, you have been ruled as obsolete.
I know, it hurts. It hurts me too. I unfriended by brother-in-law and his insipid wife. I unfriended that guy from high school that I never really spoke to 30 years ago and I don’t really want to know about his daily life. I unfriended that drunk girl from college, who claimed she was allergic to alcohol, but found a way to guzzle it every weekend. I unfriended an Army buddy who found religion. She did not necessarily find God, because she is always judging how someone else is living their lives. I unfriended that former co-worker who I remembered tried to get me fired. Witch!
I blocked Mafia Wars, My Little Pony, I have a Butt Rash, Hearts, Rabbits and other irrelevant applications that drained my phone’s battery. I stopped following and unliking artist who made sucky movies. I stopped liking artist who sold out and added rap music to beautiful R & B ballads. I stopped responding to events that I would never, ever attend, by groups, I don’t want to be associated with anyway.
I took a cue from my son.
I started to update my pages as well and began to remove people that I really didn’t deal with on a regular basis.
I am okay with it.
I just hope some my acquaintances are as well, my sister in law, I don’t really care about.
Unfriending someone is not an insult. I see it as a separation of church and state. I don’t need to see everything that is going on in my son’s life and he does not need to see what I am posting. Not that either of us are saying anything offensive.
I am glad I have a chance to now ask him how was his day, versus sharing his life vicariously through his daily updates. I, now get to talk to him in person. Unfriending me, may just save our relationship.
Olivia Gaines Author 
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