Month: September 2015

Gotham is Back and Bat Shit Crazier Than Ever

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I tuned in last night to check out the second episode of Gotham sans the diminutive Jada Pinkett-Smith.  Initially I was confused because the little man playing young Master Bruce grew at least 6 inches over hiatus.  He is still whiny.  He is still a pain in the ass.  And the kid still believes he is in control of something, as he fired Alfred last night.  If you ask me, the kid needs his ass beat, but no one will because on TV it is called child abuse and in the comic world, he is tragic figure that goes on to be the “terror that flaps in the night.” 

bruceConsidering we know his entire life story, that whole part could have been left out, but alas, it was needed to reintroduce the deep dark chocolate, computer genius Lucious Fox.

You know him, he is the guy that makes all of those wonderful gadgets.

Gadgets Bruce is going to need to combat the criminal element in Gotham; and there is a lot of them too. Barbara Gordon, whom I would swear is supposed to be Batgirl, has fallen down in Arkham and bumped her damned head. She is nuttier than a loon. 

Hell the whole darned city is nutty as hell.  I even tweeted last night that maybe the citizens of Gotham should stop drinking the water. It appears that the powers that be in Gotham agreed.

I love the show.  I am totally hooked and since they have introduced the joker, it only gets more intense. That dude is three feathers shy of a full cap. I mean really!  He was wearing a straight jacket like is was some sort of vest of some shit. 

gotham

Either way, I will tune in next week to see more of the insanity that is totally #Gotham.

What I Am Reading

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Source: What I Am Reading

Wait…Who Writes This Sh*t?

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Just when I thought it was all over and I had finally stopped laughing at being ravished by a t-rex who was a billionaire with a boner, I run across this literary gem. It is so bad, I only need to post the pic of the book cover.51+gbQs38sL._SX299_BO1,204,203,200_ Yes, you read it correctly. 

Kidnapped By Somali Pirates: White Wife Black Sex Interracial Cuckold Hotwife Fertile Pregnancy Taboo Romance. All of that is in the title on Amazon as well.  Ms. Bush, the author, would like you to pay $2.99 for this story.

I copied this synopsis for you about Sydney, a married woman who is captured by Somali Pirates and she has to go along with submitting to the men in order to live.

“In the process, she receives the most amazing pleasure that she didn’t realize was even possible. But she uses condoms with her husband for birth control and now she’s being taken bare by a powerful, sexy black man with huge equipment. Will she get pregnant? Would Jayden be supportive of his wife and raise the black baby as his own?”

I don’t know, Jayden. He had huge equipment.  After that, man it may be like giving a whale a Tic-Tac.

  Is this also a new thing?

I tell you, by the time I looked a couple of these, I could not stop myself from falling over. I am not judging.  Somewhere out there, there is a reader for this because she keeps fricking writing more. Evidently, she went black at the Christmas Party and on vacation.  Please make it stop.

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Heroes Reborn and Leeroy Jenkins Too!!!!

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NBC is trying desperately to punch its way through the Thursday night Shonda fog.  With Grey’s Anatomy, Scandal and How to Get Away with Murder bitch slapping all Thursday night competition, is a wonder that anything can get through. Along comes a lone warrior to give us hope.  Carrying a Samurai sword, a lot of attitude and language we can’t speak, he enters the Thursday night fray with a lone shout that reverberated through the internet.

On Heroes Reborn, we are introduced to new characters with special powers as the show picks u from where it left off in February of 2010.  The ratings were sluggish because the fans who were die-hard five years ago are now older with a cousin named Sallie Mae and Navient who likes to call the house every damned day. Sorry, I digress.  We are introduced to Kiki Sukezane who plays Miko, a young woman cast into what she thinks is a game in a piss poor effort to save her father who is being held hostage. And a player enters the game to assist Miko.

He dons his player gear in the real world to help her fight in what she believes to be a comic world, knowing it is connected to her finding her father.

What is amazing about this is that the lone warrior enters the fight with an iconic battle cry that has not been heard in many years.  He comes into the game and yells #leeroyjenkins!  Twitter is abuzz with this because gamers know the battle cry.  Those of us who have to work for a living did not know what it was.

I trolled the internet and search low and high to find it and here it is.  Fast forward to 1:21.  In the meantime, I will see you next week for more Heroes.

Dinosaur Erotica…Yeah…It’s a Thing

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51f+cNHRVOL__SX355_BO1,204,203,200_Someone, who is evil and shall not be named sent me a book to read, review and I assume it was to make me sit in utter confusion at the words.  Fifteen pages of a woman hunter who was ravished by a T-Rex.  No, you didn’t read it incorrectly, the book is Taken by the T-Rex.  I read a portion of it out of curiosity, to understand what the author was thinking.  Evidently, a lot of authors are into dinosaur erotica.  That is a new thing, being taken forcibly by mystical creatures if not extinct ones.

If you were like me, I could not get past the simple idea of how? 

A T-Rex has those little bitty arms. 

A T-Rex is a big lizard, don’t they lay eggs?

Then the worst idea imaginable came to mind, does a tyrannosaurus have a ding dong?

I am hating myself for even allowing it to go on this long.  Yes, it is as bad as you think it is, graphic, overtly sexual, and a woman is having sex with a T-Rex.

But, wait!  There’s more.  Here is a trailer of the insanity that I pulled off YouTube, just for your reading pleasure.

Enjoy. Vomit. Whatever….

If you think I am kidding, she has a whole series of women getting taken by prehistoric and mythical creatures. Hell, that Triceratops one isn’t even possible!

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Daniel Wu, Tweeting Live & Into The Badlands

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I m super excited about the new season on AMC.  I am even more anxious to see a martial arts dynamo kicking some butt on screen from the pleasure of my couch.  Into the Badlands premiers on AMC on November 15th staring Daniel Wu. The name might not be familiar to many American audiences but the face is.  Some may even remember him from The Man With the Iron Fist, he played Poison Dagger with that infamous line:

Poison Dagger: I’ll see you in hell!
Jackknife: [Chuckles] Yes, I suppose you will. I’ll save you a spot by the fire.

into-the-badlands-episode-101-sunny-wu-935Fans will also be very happy in this new role that Daniel is taking on as Sunny in Badlands.

AMC deems Into the Badlands as “a genre-bending martial arts series very loosely based on the classic Chinese tale Journey to the West. In a land controlled by feudal barons, Into the Badlands tells the story of a great warrior and a young boy who embark on a journey across a dangerous land to find enlightenment.”

Of course, most people aren’t familiar with 16th Century Chinese folklore of a priest and his three disciples Monkey, Pig & Friar Sand who Journey to the West to find the Buddhist Sutra.  The first 12 of 100 chapters are background info on the Monkey King and take the pebble from my hand grasshopper kind of things. The final chapters of the story describes how these unlikely heroes vanquish demons and monsters.  In order to find the Sutra, they must journey over the Fiery Mountain, cross the Milky Way, and after battling many threats to their sanity, finally arrive at their destination – the Thunder Monastery in the Western Heaven. 

Yeah. That is the story in a nutshell. I would rather just watch Daniel kick some ass.

I was curious though, since he is in between Hong Kong and LA, if he would be tweeting live with viewers.

daniel Wu

Color me disappointed, but I wasn’t the only one.  Jason was a little bummed as well. Never fear @Jason_The_Ninja, he won’t let us down.

daniel wuJoin us in November on Twitter as we tweet live with me and the show.  I am certain @Jason_The_Ninja will be there as well.